by The Stoned Beatle

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All these songs were written within one week in the winter of 2012, except "Non Fui... " which was written a little earlier. The album was kind of a response to the music that my co-conspirator Jerered and I were making. I noticed our music had become really focused on eternal, loving dreamworlds. So, I decided I wanted to make an album that was anti-love, anti-dreams, and anti-eternity/paradise. The original idea was for it to having nothing to do with love, but love snuck in anyways as it always does, and it became more an album about divorce and disillusion, along with death and destruction.

...Also, I looked, but I have no idea who made the cover. Artist, forgive me!


released January 6, 2013

The Stoned Beatle - guitar, bass, vocals, piano, drums, keyboard, harmonica, trumpet

All songs by The Stoned Beatle except
Heaven by Talking Heads



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The Stoned Beatle Vancouver, Washington

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Track Name: Paradise Is Boring
Two lovers in love walk by
Their heads both in the sky
With the birds on the clouds
And over the moon and soon they croon
Soft lullabies to lull them to sleep
And dream dreamy dreams

Of magnificent melodies
Of them humming and talking
Like in their beautiful day
They always replay in the same way

Three lovers walk by
One screws one and then another the other
They all fall asleep
I gouge out my eyes
But I feel fine
I spin around on the merry-go-round

If there was time to waste, I'd be wasting my time
I stab myself in the gut with a knife
There's nothing to it, carmel flows out
It feels just like sex

Paradise is like a nice dream
I remember it being pleasant
But I couldn't tell you why
A nice dream is like love
It makes sense while you're in it
But once you've escaped it, you start seeing the flaws
Dreams are like love in romantic movies
The beginning is nonsense, the middle's a montage
Only when it goes bad do you get vivid scenes

In paradise the dream never ends
It just starts over again
On and on without end
Before it stops it starts again

And it makes me feel like crying
But I just end up laughing myself to sleep
And in my dreams I'm pulling my teeth out
But my pain is pure opium

I'm numb and happy, neutered and horny
There's the joy in release, but I don't feel a thing
It means nothing
I accomplish nothing because nothing takes effort
And effort is easy when everything's free
In my head there's a hole full of wonder
Where my shame should be

I could tell so much more about this paradise of pleasure
Treasure and leisure beyond any measure
But I'd be slitting my throat as I told the story
Flaying my legs and praying for pain
Because paradise is boring
Track Name: I Can't Sing; Fuck You
Your face used to mean something to me
Now it doesn't
Your voice used to say words I hung on to
Now it doesn't

And on your deathbed I'll be there
Just to assure you
That the glass is most decidedly half-empty

I can't sing your praises like I used to
I can't even say that I like you
I can't be your songbird like you're used to
I know I can't sing; fuck you

We were just staring at ruins
Track Name: Vestal Virgins
Should I profane thine hand with a kiss?
Shall I compare thine beauty to a rose?
Should I feel you up and rub against your hips?
Should I tear off your clothes?

It's your fault that I am so weak
It's your fault that I fail
It's your fault if I sin
You've been tempting me again

Vestal virgins and their sacred flame
Become buried whores suffocating

"I'd rather crack my sinews, break my back
Than you should such dishonor undergo
While I sit lazy by" on the floor
But I swear I might have to attack
If you do not stop talking back, you know
Hey, go get the goddamned door

You're a saint, you're divine
You keep the flame, you're heart's with mine
You're with him, I lost the war
Burn the witch, bury the whore

Scourge my sin, bury my failure
Track Name: Non Fui, Fui, Non Sum, Non Curo
Once in another life, the dust did come
When I was so young it filled my lungs
My mother stayed and prayed for just one more day
My mother cried all night, but death did come
To take me away

I worked the dirt; I ate from the earth
I was swallowed up in dirt; I was buried in the earth

In another life, I lived by the sea
I was tall, I was strong and almost happy
I was so proud to be useful to someone
But still I was afraid that we would be
Soon lost and gone

I lived by the water; I fished my fishes from the sea
But when the waves came crashing, the fishes ate me

I was with my brother when the savages came
On a conquest to coerce what they could not claim
I grabbed my shield and spear and prepared for the kill
But my brave frame was just a fleshy vessel
For the pestilent plague

Our armies formed to fight the interlopers in our lines
But our bodies couldn't conquer the invaders inside
Track Name: Neutered Future
We've been neutered
Our castrated remains thrown into the sea
And from the frothing waters
Will form something deceptively lovely

A lot like love but lacking in virtue in sense
Like a fever dream, like a soma trance
Pointless procreation, heartless in romance
Just for recreation, nothing left to chance

And I would be ashamed, but we have no shame
And I would drop and pray, but there's no reason to pray
And I would break down and cry, but we can't even cry
And I would deign to die, but we don't ever die

Neutered future, neutered fruit
Fruitless endeavor, endeavorless youth
Track Name: Utopia
It's beautiful, it's wonderful
It's magical, it's mystical

It's beautiful, it's wonderful
It's magical, it's mythical

And I don't want to argue, but we never argue
Because there's nothing to argue about
And I don't want to hurt you, but why would I hurt you?
There's never nothing to worry about

And I'm so happy

Your towers are so high
And your rivers don't run dry
And your wonders are divine
And your pleasures are free to find

Maybe I can be an actress
On your stage, under your lights
Maybe I'll OD on pills
But I'll survive and float on by
In the sky, you can't come down
You can't die, no sirens sound

No sirens sound
Track Name: The Calm
(Du calme)
Track Name: Tempest
Oh no, is that not the answer that you want?
Oh no, dear Dawn, did I go a bit too broad?
There's never any harming feeling
There's never the right reason to run

So low, are you crying, lying on your bed?
Alone, is it something else that I said?
Let's put another shaking reel in
And try to pinpoint what went wrong

I was cold when I was a young man
Full of holes, I was chemically confused
Now I know the ledge on which I stand
Two strange souls, I'm standing here with you

I was lost when we met each other
I'm so lost now that we're apart
A thousand years of one-two stepping together
Just to circle ourselves and end at the start

Once we believed in thunderstorms
Track Name: We Believed in Thunderstorms
We believed in thunderstorms
And the rains that came afterwards
In the fire and the sparks and the shaking waves
And in the flood of tears and peace that it gave
And in the calm that came

But summer passed and no lightning appeared
No confusion, no fury, no terror, no fear
And in the midst of this arid armistice
Your faith and love had given up with this
And you left with the rain

I'm deserted in this desert of famine and thirst
You burned our fields for Moloch, but that's not the worst
For I always remember when the weather is warm
That we believed in thunderstorms
Track Name: Guns of the Third Reich

Surrender or be destroyed
Surrender and be destroyed
Surrender so be destroyed
Surrender nor be destroyed
Surrender yet be destroyed
Surrender but be destroyed
Surrender for be destroyed
Surrender or be destroyed

(Death and destruction)

Mercy. Mercy? Mercy! No mercy...
Merci. Merci? Merci! Non merci...
Track Name: Death and Destruction
I've been waiting for so long
For release to come rolling along
The fire is passing by my home
The fire is right on my lawn

My neighbors are beating on my door
The rats scramble in circles 'round the floor
The children are screaming in the street
The women are crying in defeat

Death and destruction
Is this what I've been waiting for?
Ash seals my windows
Blood smears my floor

Death and destruction
Is this worth fighting for?
Our lungs are brittle and breaking
Our flesh is scorched

The roaring has left my lover hoarse
But I'm shouting, "Olivia, I want a divorce"
A little skeleton lies silent as a mime
A torched teddy bear is all she left behind

Death and destruction
Is this what I've been waiting for?
Ash seals my windows
Blood covers my floor

Death and destruction
Is this worth fighting for?
Our lungs are brittle and breaking
Our flesh is scorched
Track Name: Ruins
I lost you a long time ago
We've just been watching the ruins
I burned down that city so many times before
I destroyed everything beautiful I saw

It's nice to see you again
It's nice to know you're so happy with him
No, no, go on, it's fine, it's alright
Go ahead and tell me how you feel when he's in sight

I always knew I'd be my own disaster
I always knew I'd be my own catastrophe
But we could try again together
If you could just take another chance on me

I know I'd never share my feelings
Yes, when I was there, I wasn't really there
Yeah, I had some long weekends
It's true, I had an affair

Did you really have to desert me?
I was willing to fight, but you were just too happy to fall
Now are you just trying to hurt me?
How could you say you never loved me at all?

If you came back with me
I thought maybe you'd see
What made you fall in love in the first place

But now I finally see
You're out of love with me
I know I fucked up, but please
Leave these ruins for me

If you came back with me
I thought maybe you'd see
What made you fall in love in the first place

But now finally I see
You're out of love with me
I know I fucked up, but please
Don't bury these ruins without me